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Personal Development Self Growth

Abundance of Time Mindset: Embracing Ease and Flow

Our to-do lists are often essential for productivity but the sense of urgency that comes with them can often make time feel scarce

The more we feel time slipping away, the more anxiety can creep in. 

Despite the vastness of time in the universe, our perception of time is interesting. If we reference NASA articles, they speak of time in terms of hundreds of millions of years. Yet, we are hard-wired to believe that we are always running out of time, influenced by societal expectations and pressure of where we should be by what age. This pattern of rushing and striving to do more consumes our lives at macro and micro levels, fueled by a fear-driven ego.

But here’s my aha moment: What if we also applied the concept of an abundance mindset to TIME? Imagine how it could radically transform our perception of time and lighten the pressure we put on ourselves. Instead of feeling like we’re constantly being chased by time, we could dance to the rhythm of life. Adding more flow and reducing anxiety in whatever we’re occupied with. The only difference is how we will feel in the doing of things we’re occupied with. After all, it’s our perception that shapes our experience.

So, what happens if we bring this theory into practice?

We bring presence to the table, and we bring it to our day-to-day lives. When we apply an abundance mindset to time, we assure ourselves that we have all the time needed to experience and get done. We give ourselves the assurance and peace that comes with trust and faith in the present moment.  Suddenly, the moments are no longer filled with anxiety.

It allows us to focus and get more done without feeling distracted or leaving things half-done because we’re always rushing to the next thing. By slowing down, we actually gain more time.

When we trust, we welcome ease and flow. As we let go of the resistance that comes with scarcity, we slingshot forward. That sense of abundance in time gives us time back in a spiritual sense by adding peace to our day 😌

I’m sure you’ve experienced it, too – the more you do, the more you can get done, and the more time seems to expand. It’s almost astonishing how productive we can be when actively engaged. On the other hand, when we’re inactive, it feels like we never have enough time or energy to do much.

Our world is a mirror reflecting what we’re feeling. If we think that time is scarce, our focus on that joins forces with circumstances and events to prove that. The famous quote, “as within, so without,” comes to mind. If we slow down and trust that we’ll get to our entire to-do list, imagine what could happen to our output! The flow feels magical, and our undivided attention creates a channel for better results✨

From a broader perspective, when we let go of the need to shape every experience to fit our expectations, life can pleasantly surprise us, often turning out better than our plans! Like watching a beautiful sunset, where we don’t plan or choose the colors of the sky, yet it never fails to mesmerize us with its awe-inspiring display of changing hues. So, why not give it a try and let go of the need to control the hows and whens of things? There might just be perfect timing for accomplishing what we desire.

This also differs from procrastination at a micro level because it’s not about putting things off but rather giving ourselves grace. To fuel what we’re doing with presence, to enjoy the journey. To not inject the experience with feelings of frustration or disappointment with ourselves for what we didn’t get to or things we cannot control. but appreciating what we are experiencing instead. Otherwise, we’re neither there nor here but in between, giving the power of our presence away.

Categories
Coaching Personal Development Self Growth Wellbeing

Embracing Self-Compassion to Thrive

Lately, I’ve been noticing more and more how critical of an ingredient self-compassion is in allowing us to be present and there for others authentically with humility and an open heart.  

What if the first thought we had in relation to self-compassion was humility instead of ego?

The influence our degree of self-compassion has in how we experience life and our enjoyment of it daily is vast.

To carry a joy and excitement for life, not only when we’re on holiday or on a trip – but every day as we meet others, our lives, our careers, and our self! To listen and hear, to see, be, and feel.

The most common thing that occurs when we abandon our self-compassion is our inability to effectively use these inherent human functions we’re born with. 

Now more than ever, there is a dire need for a shift in our mindset on self-compassion. What it means, and what it truly does for us.  

HOW LACKING SELF-COMPASSION HURTS US IN OUR LIVES:

  • We are never fully satisfied or feel good enough in our workplace due to a constant stream of self-doubt and self-criticism
  • Our productivity and performance is impacted, we even work ourselves to burnout and hurt our professional relationships.
  • In our relationships, we project our self-criticism by being critical of how others should behave to make us happy, making it difficult for true connection and vulnerability.
  • We unintentionally yet continuously create a rift within our connections with others and a lack of empathy within our connections (think interrupting our friends when they’re talking) 
  • We fail to show up authentically! Even for the most special occasions, our presence can’t meet others while buried in shame, pain, and heaviness, causing us to be less engaged in conversations, distracted, and self-isolate

HOW SELF-COMPASSION HELPS US:

Being self-compassionate is not only empowering, but it is also proven to:

  1. Improve our mental health by reducing depression, anxiety, stress, and substance abuse.
  2. Enhance our physical health, including improved immune system and lower blood pressure
  3. Increase our coping skills and emotional resilience
  4. Betters our professional and academic performance 
  5. Create motivation for making change in our life 

Who knew a little kindness could go so far. Oscar Wilde said, “to love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” I heard this quote on my meditation, Monday morning after sending the first edition of Sunday Tea with the topic of Self-love and was all smiles by the synchronicity. Twisting the words a bit to a natural truth to our existence – being in love with life itself can arguably be the biggest gift of life to be awake to.

PRACTICAL TIPS TO CULTIVATE SELF-COMPASSION:

As a recovering perfectionist, I am an enthusiast for positive affirmations as a tool for self-compassion in that they help us reframe and transform our negative beliefs! They can be a cushion to cozy into from negative thoughts. 

Good news is I won’t sound like a broken record because there are many ways to practice self-compassion in your daily life – so if positive affirmations aren’t for you. – NO FRET there are many other ways to cultivate self-compassion:

  • Validate your emotions: allow yourself to feel your emotions without judging them for coming through. We were created with emotions to experience and grow through life with them.. 
    • Ask and discern what they’re teaching you as opposed to resorting to escaping or numbing how we feel? The more we avoid our feelings, the more they persist.  You may be surprised how quickly it may pass if you allow it to come through – kind of like the relief after a good cry!
  • Prioritize activities that nourish your mind, body, and inner being; 

    • Practice mindfulness by spending a day or half-day without your phone to give your mind space, in the present moment and not feel at the whim of technology or constant context switching! 
    • Become aware of your thoughts! Ask yourself if your thoughts are a reflection of facts or just negative personal beliefs 
    • Give back to your body! It could be taking your favorite exercise class (pilates anyone?) to treat your muscle memory to something new.  
    • Give your mind, soul, and body a treat by going on a 30 minute walk outside for fresh air and energy! Imagine if we were outside as much as we spend time scrolling through social media. 
    • Treat yourself to a massage at least, once a month!! Your body deserves a good massage or movement activity that gets your energy moving. If massage isn’t for you, try acupuncture with an expert or foam rolling at home! Imagine, 60 minutes to honor our body once a month (minimum), is only 12 self-love hours a year – in comparison to the average adult that sits about 2-3,000 hours per year (according to the journal of occupational and environmental medicine). That is some shocking stats to learn our body is sitting for about 83-125 FULL DAYS!!!  Is that a big motivator to GET UP or what?
  • Create a thank-me list: think of the things you love and appreciate about yourself; say it outloud or write it in your phone or notebook so it’s accessible – front and center to lean on. Make it at least 10 things ! bonus tea if it’s more!!
    • Having this on hand is so helpful when we get self-critical or say, “I’m so lazy”, or “I never get things right” to one of your favorite qualities or skills like being an awesome cook!
    • All this to say, think about your positive qualities, things you like about yourself, your talents, skills, traits, personality, relationships, and accomplishments. Being a caring mom or dad? Reliable sibling or friend? A loyal Wife, Husband or Partner? A loving Son or Daughter? A devoted  colleague? The list can go on. 
    • We show up as so many different people in different contexts every day! Honor yourself. 
  • Forgive yourself! Acknowledge where you made a mistake, learn from it and move on. No one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes!
    • As soon as we forgive ourself, we create the space for healing and growth to happen.
    • Accept your flaws, and imperfections. It’s okay to be human!!
    • Write yourself a letter of forgiveness by writing out everything you’re angry yourself about followed by a love letter to give yourself the self-love and appreciation you deserve 

Remember, self-compassion and kindness (or anything self-growth) isn’t overnight! It takes time, messing up, effort, and patience. Be kind to yourself just as you are with a baby learning to walk. It is so much about small steps, being aware when we forget, and trying again. Otherwise, we’d never learn to walk!!

I’d love to hear from you if you have any thoughts or comments.

With love,

Sholeh